Review: will.i.am & Britney Spears' "Mind Your Business" is Awful

This shouldn’t have left will.i.am’s laptop.

The thing is, I was minding my business. It was just another Monday. And then will.i.am decided to disrupt my life by announcing a new collaboration with Britney Spears dropping the next day, Tuesday, July 18th. That turned out to be bullshit, just like the poor excuse for a song that finally materialized on Friday July 21st. “Mind Your Business” might just be the worst Britney Spears song ever released.

Musically, things have been mostly silent for Britney since 2016’s well-compiled Glory, save for a fall 2022 “duet” with Elton John, which frankly was nothing to brag about. It’s been understood and respected that over the last few years there were bigger and much more important things happening in the world of Britney Spears than creating new music. That only fueled the consistent hunger for new Britney music, so when will.i.am teased this unexpected new Britney record earlier this week, the internet overflowed with excitement. 

Unfortunately it’s all been downhill from there. For starters, the aforementioned Tuesday release date turned out to be a lie, which should have been the first indication that this was going to be a bumpy ride. Late on Tuesday afternoon, much to the frustration of fans, will.i.am announced that the song’s actual release date would be Friday, July 21st (the standard release date for new music and beginning of the tracking week). The wait turned out to be far from worth it. 

“Mind Your Business” is a cacophony of annoyances that shouldn’t have left will.i.am’s laptop. It’s one of the messiest things you’ll ever hear.

The song is a half-assed rehash of previous will.i.am-Britney productions including “Work Bitch” and “Scream & Shout,” full of mindless dribble and forgettable verses from both parties. It’s tied together with a repeated, spoken line meant to suffice as the hook. And it is, in fact catchy. Not catchy enough to save this train-wreck though. Britney mostly steers clear of singing, save for stringing a few notes together in the most elementary fashion. She sounds largely disinterested in the whole affair. 

Near the end of the song, Britney threatens to sic the dogs on anyone who doesn’t get out of her face. “You know what happens when the dogs come out?” she asks flatly, before confusingly responding with, “none. of. your. business.” Wouldn’t an explanation make for a better deterrent? It creates more questions than answers, while reinforcing the recurring question surrounding this song: “why?” It makes me want to mind my business and never listen to another collaboration between these two, and simultaneously get a restraining order to keep will.i.am from ever collaborating with Britney again. It’s also worth noting that the cover art, which features the duo standing back-to-back in front of a futuristic backdrop, uses a 2003 photo of Britney, not anything remotely current. Why? Just why? 

It’s hard to listen to Britney on records in this day in age, because it presents a sad reality: she doesn’t appear to possess the confidence or interest in music that she once did. She sounds lost and uncertain. At times she’s barely even on-beat. And here’s the thing: she doesn’t ever have to make another song again unless she wants to. But she has to want it. I hope one day she does, because it sure doesn’t sound like she wanted to do this. “Mind Your Business” is best left alone and forgotten, but I’ll still be rooting for her, whatever comes next.