Love & Life... & Lackluster Results

A re-examination of Mary J. Blige's 2003 LP Love & Life

Today is a chance to double back two decades to an album that I’ve continuously struggled to get down with. On this day in 2003, Mary J. Blige released Love & Life, her highly anticipated reunion album with Puff Daddy (who was going by P. Diddy by this time, but will be referred to as “Puff” here throughout). It was their first full-length collaboration since 1994’s career-defining My Life. Puff even remarked that the album was something of a continuation of their 1994 classic. 

The early aughts was a momentous time in the history of Mary J. Blige. She was on an upward swing, having excelled at expanding her sonic profile after splitting from Puff. 1997’s Share My World was massive. She further expanded on the soft, yet overwhelming power of 1999’s Mary, and then reached a peak with 2001’s No More Drama. She made a firm and adamant proclamation with that album title, tour-de-force of a title song, and 2002 Grammy performance that is ranks among the greatest of all time. 

After years of struggle and strife, Mary didn’t just say she was no more drama, she lived it. She found love, however temporary it may have turned out to be, and was engaged. And no, his name will not be mentioned here. He ain’t shit, and if you don’t know why, Google is your friend. At the time, it was a beautiful moment. Mary found love and got married shortly after the album came out. She also found Puff again. They’d reunited on a fantastic remix to “No More Drama,” which set the stage for a fuller reunion. Soon they were in the studio banging out tracks. Along with his in-house production crew The Hitman, Puff produced all but one track on 2003’s Love & Life. 

Despite the high anticipation, the album failed to elevate Mary to a higher level like her previous albums. Going into this re-examination, I continued to struggle with the album as a whole, despite the moments that shine so bright they’re blinding. Spending time with the album for this piece has been the first moment that the album has finally started to click. After this re-examination, I think that one of the issues that held the album back was the sequencing, because it is by no means a bad album. There’s great material here. It just doesn’t flow in a fashion that allows it shine properly. 

Mary kicked off the album in June 2003, with the banging lead single “Love @ 1st Sight” featuring Method Man. A revelatory, effervescent, Aretha-”Day Dreaming”-esque introduction yields to a hard, bass-heavy loop derived from A Tribe Called Quest’s “Hot Sex” that is pure hip hop. 20 years later, it still has an unrelenting grip on me. I can’t help but groove and make that scrunched up face you involuntarily make when a record hits so hard it’s ridiculous. It also makes for a wondrous reunion with Method Man, with whom Mary brought the world one of hip hop’s greatest love songs: “I’ll Be There For You/You’re All I Need” (and shout out to Drew Dixon for having the brilliant ears to hear the song’s need for Mary). “Love @ 1st Sight” brims with optimism, butterflies in the stomach, hope, and joy. It feels like hot, New York summer days, where the pavement’s sizzling and love is blossoming. It’s one of Mary’s best lead singles. 

From there, the 18-track album makes all the right moves, but something about it doesn’t click. 13 year-old me didn’t stick with the album for long. Admittedly, at that age I could be more of a track-driven listener than an album listener, depending. If an album didn’t click after a listen or two, I’d reserve my key tracks and more or less kept it moving. Over the years I’ve returned to it occasionally, but it’s always failed to connect and fill in the many blanks it left me years ago. 

There was a criticism and concern from fans that began around this time. There was a notion that a “happy Mary” wouldn’t make as good of music as “sad Mary.” The album’s performance didn’t exactly dispel this notion. When she released 2005’s blockbuster The Breakthrough though, that completely shattered it. 

Over and over though, Mary evokes the spirit of My Life. The interlude “Free,” despite being sample-free, feels like a sonic companion to much of My Life with its sweet, soaring strings, wandering bass, and tinkling piano keys. The same goes for the opening track “Don’t Go,” “When We,” and “Friends,” among others.

Though I think there are better suited openers for the album, “Don’t Go”’s opening line of “everyday is not a perfect day for you and I” sets the tone of the album well. Mary’s relationships, struggles, and woes, are the soundtrack to many of our lives. She’s found love and she’s trying her best. But no one’s best is perfect or without faltering. 

One true standout from my 2023 listens of the album has been “When We.” Fueled by a sample of Marvin Gaye’s seminal “I Want You,” the album’s second full-length song is a tour de force. Mary pushes herself vocally to the limits of her upper register, gunning for notes that are outside of her comfort zone, and it pays off. She sounds so impassioned and in it, in the best way possible. This one is going on my Mary J. Blige playlist. 

On “Friends,” she takes Barry White’s smooth instrumental “Mellow Mood Pt. 1” and transforms it into a dark rumination on friendships. “I thought you were my friend” she laments as she attempts to understand so-called friends who lie, never have best interests at heart, and seem to be opportunists. 

There’s also a crop of hard-hitting, grimey, New York-rooted records that are contemporary, but carry the spirit of Mary’s hip hop-soul roots. Then-exploding superstar 50 Cent appears for the yearning “Let Me Be The 1.” Anchored by another hard beat, supported by a Funkadelic sample, the record highlights the uncertainty of a budding relationship, accentuated by ominous piano and yearning lyrics. Similar is the deep synthwork on the trudge-ahead “Press On.” It’s a solid addition to the canon of resilient Mary records.

The other song that rose above the rest was the one from the standard edition of the album that Combs didn’t have his hands on. “Not Today.” Produced by icon, legend, and still-not-fully-accountable woman abuser Dr Dre, “Not Today” is yet another hip-hop-rooted record with hard-hitting percussion and that classic Dre sound, thanks in part to frequent Dre-collaborator and bassist Mike Elizondo. 

Eve also joins to deliver a searing, scene-stealing kiss-off of a verse that elevates the record, dismissing a worthless excuse for a significant other. Mary’s through with the bullshit, and so is Eve, both inundated with broken promises and nonsense. The song also served as a promotional vehicle for Eve’s 2003 film Barbershop 2 and the video included cameos from some of the film’s actors, as well as appearing on the film’s soundtrack. 

Upon re-examination though, “Not Today” proves to be a misstep for the album as a body of work. Sonically it sticks out like a sore thumb and doesn’t gel with the rest of the record. It would have served Mary better to tack this on at the end of the album and label it a bonus track. 

The album’s initial second single “Ooh!” is yet another immaculate blend of hip hop soul. Built on a sample of Ed OG’s “I Gotta Have It,” Mary once again testifies to the magnitude of this man’s impact on her. The song also received a light makeover from 50 Cent and his G-Unit crew, which were a perfect addition to the record.

A video was also shot for “Ooh!” and documented on BET’s Access Granted. However, the video was quickly pulled. It’s unclear if the video was even put into rotation or ever aired aside from the initial premiere during Access Granted. 

The lead single clocks in at track 8, and I tended to clock out thereafter. There are some solid records that follow though, including the aforementioned “Friends,” “Press On,” and “Willing & Waiting.” I think that it would have been a smarter move to open the album with “Love @ 1st Sight.” It’s a pretty standard move to sequence the singles near the top of an album to draw in the listener, but perhaps by the time the album was sequenced everyone was over each other and they just kind of said “fuck it.”

Some editions of Love & Life were accompanied by a DVD which documented the making of the album. Strangely, it even contained footage of songs that didn’t make the album, including a song co-written with Floetry called “Way Down,” that sounds like a stellar record. It’s never surfaced. The documentary also wasn’t shy about showing the tension that arose between Mary and Puff (and Mary’s fiance) as the album’s sessions unfolded. Just like nearly a decade prior, their differences got the best of them and their working relationship deteriorated. 

One gift of that breakdown, Mary started holding back songs she’d created for the project and some found other homes. Two songs initially written for Love & Life with Troy Taylor, “Holdin’ On” and “No Matter What,” ended up in the hands of Aretha Franklin. She included them (and background vocals from Mary) on her album So Damn Happy, which was released just three weeks after Love & Life. A new version of one song, “No Matter What,” recently and mysteriously appeared on streaming services (save for Spotify) which includes Aretha calling Mary to tell her that “this is tight girlfriend.” Special shout out to the Craig Seymour for noticing that and bringing it to my attention. 

Regardless of how you feel about the album, Love & Life remains a glossed-over era in the Mary J. Blige canon. She rarely performs songs from the album, save for the inclusion of “Don’t Go” on setlists in 2008. All the talk of Love & Life being the sequel to My Life completely evaporated when Mary released My Life II… The Journey Continues (Act 1) in 2011. With Puff absent for that album’s production, it doesn’t sonically align with its predecessor like Love & Life does. 

I’m really glad that Love & Life has come together a little more for me this time around. I do think a few more re-examinations will happen in the future, because the ballads that largely populate the last chunk of the album are still not fully clicking for me. We all won’t love every album out there, but I always love a time-taken progression into appreciation.

International versions of the album also included a few bonus tracks, most notably Mary’s duet with Sting, “Whenever I Say Your Name.” Though the song didn’t do anything notable on the charts, it did score a Grammy in 2004 for Best Pop Collaboration with Vocals for Mary and Sting. The song’s video also repurposed footage from the scrapped “Ooh!” video. There are also some cool mixes of the track, including one by will.i.am which features some additional vocals by will and Fergie.